One place in the UK where it's HOT

There's a semolina mist coming over the north east coast near Whitley Bay, so it's a particularly bad time to be behind the wheel squinting like an angry pirate. "Aaaargh, fffff, rrrr" I scream, lapsing into that second language spoken by chilli-eaters that have absent-mindedly rubbed their hands somewhere without washing them first. When you're peering through a prickly eye trying not to give a four-wheeled buzzcut to a seaside roundabout, it's tempting to question why people feel the need to jam this fiery pain down their throats in the first place. "Maybe it's the fact it's exotic," says Simone Clarkin, one of the organisers hurtling around the first North East Chilli Festival in Northumberland. "Of course, sometimes it's also a bit about being macho and having the hottest thing there is." I can't remember when I started craving nuclear levels of chilli heat, but I'm well aware of what I've become. I've ingested pastes, sprays and little drops of death handled with thin syringes and thick gloves. I've swerved away from taste sensations on restaurant menus because they don't have enough little chilli icons next to them. My white whale is tiny, red or green, and has the power to make my eyes water like the end of the last Toy Story movie . The North East Chilli Festival is for lost souls like me, but also for the food-lovers who know what it can do for all sorts of exotic foodstuffs, from breads to vodkas, curries and coffees. The first thing you noticed when you wound up the road to Seaton Delaval Hall were the queues. Nearly 6,000 advance tickets were sold for the two-day event, which was organised by Northumberland's own Hot Stuff Chilli , the National Trust, and award-winning Newcastle deli mmm… . Organisers reckoned hundreds more turned up on the day. Simone, who co-owns mmm..., says: We've been mobbed since 10am. Lots of people have been coming up to say it's a great event. It's not just about hot chillis. It's about beer and music and some gentler recipes. People love their chillis in the North East, and many of them have been looking forward to this weekend for a long time. Chilli peppers originally hailed from the Americas thousands of years ago, but now they're everywhere. Producers pitched up in Northumberland from all over the UK, from Chilli Pepper Pete in the Brighton area to the Dartmoor Chilli Farm and Cumbria's Mr Vikki's . Bedfordshire's Edible Ornamentals grows over 50 different types of chilli, including the Ghost Chilli and the Trinidad Scorpion, and also makes a range of gourmet sauces. Co-owner Joanna Plumb says: You don't want to overwater them. The trick in growing chillis is to treat them mean. Chillis have also inspired a community of creative people. Mother and daughter team Patricia and Stacey Galfskiy run Chillilicious in Fife. Patricia whips up the chutneys and oatcakes, while Stacey makes chilli-themed glass boards and plates from unusual stuff: I make fused glass out of recycled bottles I get from the local inn. It's a different way to use things you chuck away every day. Stacey has two kilns at the bottom of the garden, and creates distinctive chilli chopping boards that are handy when you don't want that lingering spice on your other surfaces. Everyone who does a lot of cooking with chillis will know that it gets into all of your chopping boards, both wood and plastic, and everything you chop afterwards tastes of chilli. That's fine, except when you want to have a banana. According to Joanna from Edible Ornamentals, the allure of the chilli comes partly from the fact that it causes the body to release its 'happy drug' endorphin. In which case, the happiest man in Northumberland on Saturday was Leicester warehouse worker Dean Burford, who devoured a range of hot horrors to win a chilli eating contest which tested the strongest of stomachs. There were several others seeking out the buzz at The Chilli Pepper Company 's stall. The Cumbria firm lurks at the top end of spicy, offering a range of sauces, powders and pastes with warning notes and skull labels. Owner Gerald Fowler says: I started in the chilli business in 1996, and since then there have been a lot of people opening chilli businesses and chilli farms. I've found my own niche and gone for everything hot, so if you want extreme, this is the place to come." On day one, Gerald says he sold 250 bottles of his 10 Minute Burn hot sauce, which has been banned from several festivals and even Royal Navy ships due to its potency. Also on show was a sauce made from his Naga Viper pepper, which was officially the world's hottest chilli for a short while last year. Gerald says: It's been fantastic today. We've done maybe ten shows this year, and this has been the busiest and the best show by far. Whether it's the people up here or the marketing of the show, I don't know. But they love the hot stuff here. Up and down the country, at food festivals, restaurants and barbecues, there's always at least one person driven to test how hot they can go before their eyes pop out. So does Gerald have any advice on how to tone down that lingering after-taste of pain? Yes: You definitely need a dairy product, something like cheese. Even bread works really well. What I've found is that drinking a Corona through the lemon takes the heat right away. And always remember to wash your hands. John Hill is a freelance writer and journalist based in Newcastle. You can get in touch with him on Twitter @John_PJ_Hill